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Wooden Boat Fittings
08-05-2009, 07:30 AM
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... and a fun read (http://www.yosc.org.uk/dictnry.htm), courtesy of John Weale and the Yateley Offshore Sailing Club of the UK.

A few examples to whet your appetite --

Bar :
Long, low-lying navigational hazard, usually awash, found at river mouths and harbour entrances, where it is composed of sand or mud, and ashore, where it is made of mahogany or some other dark wood. Sailors can be found in large numbers around both.

Distress Signals :
International signals which indicate that a boat is in danger. For example, in Italian waters: moaning, weeping, and wild gesticulations; in French waters: fistfights, horn blowing, and screamed accusations; in Spanish waters: boasts, taunts, and random gunfire; in Irish waters: rhymthic grunting, the sound of broken glass, and the detonation of small explosive devices; in Japanese waters: shouted apologies, the exchange of calling cards, and minor self-inflected wounds, in American waters: the sudden appearance of lawyers, the pointing of fingers and repression of memories; and in English waters: doffed hats,the burning of toast, and the spilling of tea.

Gimbals :
Movable mountings often found on nautical lamps, compasses, etc., which provide dieting passengers an opportunity to observe the true motions of the ship in relation to them, and thus prevent any recently ingested food from remaining in their digestive systems long enough to be converted into unwanted calories.

Points :
Traditional units of angular measurement from the viewpoint of someone on board a vessel. They are: Straight ahead of you, right up there; Just a little to the right of the front; Right next to that thing up there; Between those two things; Right back there, look; Over that round whatsit; Off the right corner; Back over there; and Right behind us.

Shower :
Due to restricted space, limited water supplies, and the difficulty of generating hot water, showers on board ship are quite different from those taken ashore. Although there is no substitute for direct experience, a rough idea of a shipboard shower can be obtained by standing naked for two minutes in a cupboard with a large, wet dog.

Yawl :
Version of ahoy as said in the Southern U.S.


As I said, a fun read.

Mike

Concordia...41
08-05-2009, 07:58 AM
Excellent! Thanks Mike!

- M

Ian McColgin
08-05-2009, 09:51 AM
These are good. It repeats a few of the definitions found in Beard & McKie's immortal "Sail-ing: 1. n. the fine art of getting wet and becoming ill while slowly going nowhere at great expense." Complete with charming cartoons, the bigger edition dates from 1981, republished 20 years later in 4"X4" somewhat abridged.

Right after these guy's oil, the book has

oilskin
Irritating epidermal condition suffered by boat owners who work on diesel engines.

and

rhumb line
1 Straight-line course plotted on a flat Mercator chart.
2 Shipboard dance similare in some respects to a very wobbly conga line.

and they never should have left out

surf'n'turf
Popular harborside restaurant dish consisteing, typically, of a lobster tail and a bilet mignon. Other generally accpted terms for this combination are: Angler'n'Wrangler; Beef'n'Reef; Maine'n'Plain; Pound'n'Sound; Paw'n'Claw; Loam'n'Foam; Chap'n'Trap; Steer'n'Pier; Kine'n'Brine; Marine'n'Bovine; Pattle'n'Saddle' Oar'n'Shore; Sand'n'Brand; Tide'n'Hide; Dive'nDrive; Comber'n'Roamer; Lasso'n'Sargasso; Ship'n'Whip; Boat'n'Oat; Cut'n'Scud; Rudder'n'Udder; Slime'n'Prime; Scow'n'Cow; and Ooze'n'Moos.

I hope somewhere on the site they attribute and I urge you all to get whichever edition of the book you can lay hands on.

johngsandusky
08-05-2009, 12:36 PM
I keep a copy aboard for when I'm cranky. Still makes me laugh out loud after all these years.