New Zealand

[ahp]

I just read another thread about box jellys and other nasties in Australian waters. That made me curious.

What about New Zealand? Do people go to the beach,snorkle and swim? What nasties are there? And what is the summer water temperature?

[John B]

Not really any nastys to worry about. Very occasionally you hear of a shark attack and they are there for sure but its not something that keeps people out of the water.
We used to occasionally get a type of man o war jellyfish arriving on west coast beaches but their sting is painful but not life threatening or anything like the Aussie ones we've just read about.
water temp. ? gee? 18,19 to low 20's(C) perhaps depending on where you are and when in the season. At 18 its cold. low 20's is pleasant.
NZ is temperate and where I live in the Nth Island you don't get super hot in summer or super cold in winter.

I think we're a bit naive as a culture when we travel. Nothing here will eat us on land ( except for the rotty down the road) no snakes, a couple of rare venomous spiders. this little aspect showed itself just last week ( in reverse)
My Australian cousin and family are over here travelling. they saw some kids running around in long grass and Andrew very nearly chased them out , before he realised... no snakes.!

[Wild Dingo]

Originally posted by ahp:
What about New Zealand?What about New Zealand?? MAAAAATE!! They got major mean mongrel critters over there! true they have!!... They got sheep! NO not just ANY sheep they got Kiwi Sheep!!! feirce mongrels them sheep mate see the Kiwi fellas got the sheep so flamin scared that they run backwards over there and a reversin sheep is a dangerous thing specially when they got a bloody great Kiwi chasin em goin "Come on sheepie come on oooooooohhh puuuhhleeeeeeeese" :D Them Kiwi fellas arent known as sheepchuckers for nothin mate! And the sheep are startin to retaliate and its strongly advised on the New Zealand goberment site that all tourists must keep their women away from ram sheep of New Zealand extraction! Scarey thought? You augta see what the flamin Ewes do to any unwary male tourist!! :eek:

And they got flamin Kiwis!! :eek: you ever seen a Kiwi on heat?? MATE!!! scarey as all heck is a Kiwi on heat and dangerous? MAN theyre so flamin dangerous New Zealands gobernment is sendin em over here where we know how to handle dangerous birds ;)

oh an its got JohnB of course :rolleyes:

Oh but hes okay hes got Waione and that makes him alright in my book... bit of a buggar though since he wont bring her over to stay with me even though under the NZWAT (thats the recently acredited treaty whereby all legendary older New Zealand boats of distinctly gorgeous lines must by law have West Aussie co owners and share equal time between the two treaty of 2004) he still hasnt bought her over for my time with her typical Kiwi is our mate JohnB :rolleyes:

Hey!! But theyre mad buggars! Have you read of this blokes madcapped sailin adventures? Strewth its nothin for him to be out racin in force 5 winds 20ft swells and phissin rain... mere walk in the park to those blokes

I thought you were comin down this way for Chrissy mate? I was lookin forward to a visit

Nothin here can hurt yer ;) Would I lie to you mate? all that stuff we Aussies put out about joe blakes and man eatin roos and such its just to keep the tourist numbers down otherwise if we didnt we would have to have to stop the roo culls and instead have the occasional tourist cull... so we tell a few wee porkies to keep them away... believe me mate nothin here can harm yer! nope not a thing well okay a few a mere one or two creatures like the drop bears but hey just remember to wear your akubra and you'll be right oh an have a block of some good beer on hand in case you get accosted by a wanderin emu its well known down here that you can bribe an emu with a few warm beers... mmm maybe you better get yourself a couple of bottles of Bundy rum while your at it since the wombats sorta like that stuff and a sober wombats a sight to avoid mate

Cheers from safe as houses Aussie! :D

[John B]

:D ya fool. :D anyone else notice how quiet it is here when the Dingo's away.

Sheep? I told you before Shane, they're on the way out.. its dairy thats the business now.They keep these 'dairy producers' out of town though. They're out on plots of land called farrums( something like that anyway). These farrums are covered in a substance that you'd find unusual. Its long and green..... verdant one might almost say and our name for it is "grass".Now I know that you have a type of "grass" over there , but its actually different. It grows on the ground here.

[JimJ]

Like most creatures of NZ extraction, they have seen the light and are all in OZ.

[Wild Dingo]

GOOD GRIEF!!! yous blokes aint gonna start COWCHUCKIN??? geeeeeeeeeeeeeeezuzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!! :eek: Man your madder than even I thought!! Sheepchuckin I can almost understand almost but not quite but then I dont get as cold as you blokes so the warmth around the gronicles is sorta understandable... BUT COWS???? Nah dont do it mate!!!

Farrums? oh right where they pull the teets to get the milk stuff eh? well see I reckon yous blokes should only have imported milk John... I mean yous fellas had enough trouble with the bloody sheep and they dont give milk!! Imagine when some Kiwi faarrrum bloke starts playin with tits with 4 nipples!!! your missus's reckon it was bad with you an your sheepchuckin imagine the poor bloody deprived sheilas all over NZ if their blokes spend every second muckin with 4 nippled cows!! :eek:

But then do yer reckon it could have somethin to do with yous fellas havin a sheila as the boss cocky in the goberment? maybe she likes it without the blokes around? :eek: And is encouraging any form of chuckin just to keep yous fellas occupied?... mmmm wonder what all the sheilas reckon of bein deprived of their men and their chuckin abilities? OHHHH!!! RIIIGHT!! explains the mass exodus to Aussie but the beautishus Kiwi sheila dont it! :D

Only in New Zealand eh! :cool:

Green stuff? on the ground? nah mate not around here unless someone upchucked after drinkin too much plonk an eatin asparagas or those little green cabbage things thats the only time we see that stuff... but hey our sheeps an cows are tuff mate they can eat anythin an survive and mate? we dont chuckem either!! :D

John mate Im tellin yer stay on the water!! that land lubbin caper over your way is a real worry tongue.gif

[ahp]

Plonk? What do you mean by plonk, Dingo? Is that the same as FRENCH slang for wine that is too awful to send to the US of A.

New Zealand sounds like a destination. I learned to milk cows at an early age.

New Zealand has a female PM? Must be a progessive place. We have an old fashoned male president and he is messing up BAD! He has evil companions too.

[Meerkat]

Popcorn anyone? ;)

[Wild Dingo]

Yep thats it in a nutshell Art plonk ala vino that one wouldnt feed to a starving alcoholic in a fit... well actually most of that chateu da cardboard fits into the "plonk" catagory... you can take it I dont drink the snot since every drop Ive had even the more expensive ones taste like... well sour grapes :rolleyes: yech! give me a nice cold beer anyday

New Zealand would be a destination thats true... but I tell yer you will have to tie the missus down while yer there and not listen to any Kiwi fella that asks if you wanna go to a ffaaarruuum and certainly stay away from sheepchukers... and now cowchuckers... theyd chuck anything them kiwis sad but true mad chuckers for sure! :D

Pretty place from all reports and have some fine sailin over there beautiful women who are sex mad and well most of them are chuckers to but they are kinda starved in the chuckin side of things since the blokes tend to love their sheep too much which makes it a good thing for a single bloke to know ;) However not so good for us ol married types

Yep they gots Ms Mrs or Miss Clarke as their Prime Minister! A foine lookin sheila too by gar ;) well for a kiwi polititian that is... I do think if shes bringin this cow chuckin caper in then shes an evil person truely evil and should be the next on your pres's hit parade of axis of evil to take over... no oil sadly but hey plenty of lonely bored sheilas specially out on the faaaarrruuums what with all the sheepchuckin an all theres bound to be!! tongue.gif

As for popcorn? why would anyone eat popcorn when a well known forumite kiwi is busy chuckin sheep and is now threatenin to chuck cows??? I mean as my girls say "eeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww gross!!" :D

We all know Johns probably one of the more saner kiwis but mates you gotta know theyre all mad!! The whole shootin match of the blighters are mad as a bag of cut snakes! THEY ARE!!! oooh come on John mate you know they are accept it ol son :rolleyes:

Not sayin they aint nice people they are!! say "eh" a lot sorta like the Canuks but theyre the only race of buggars I know that have sex on the brain and teach it at school "1 2 3 4 5 sux 7 etc" :D

Mad I tell yer!!

[ 12-01-2005, 08:52 PM: Message edited by: Wild Dingo ]

[John B]

totally crazy.

excuse me, I must go as I have some shoppin to do for the weekends SAILING.(Its Friday afternoon here).

Its a B B que sat night too. Just a bunch of old classics ( and their boats) sliding down to Paddy O'Bay about oooo 20 miles down Waiheke Island. Lemmee see, there's the sausages, and the RUM and ......

But I am a bit worried, will I remember how to set the topsail? Its been MONTHS.I think I'm a gonna need it.. looking like 10 to 15 and fine at the moment.

AHP. NO BITEY stingy poisonous things here( to speak of) ;)

[Meerkat]

Hmmm... yet, "vin du boite" (wine in a box) is a major export of Oz... ;)

Speaking of "chucking", one must keep in mind that Aussies have no end of sheep and how Aussie sheepmen find sheep in tall grass - irresistable! :D

[Meerkat]

Paddy O'Bay? - any relation to Paddy O'Furniture? ;) :D

[John B]

Seems to be spelt different on the chart. Patio bay. I always thought it was owned by an irishman.To be sure.

[Billy Bones]

ahhhh, Rummmmmmm, What sorta rum you get over your way John? Is your latitude favorable for the growth of the magnificent sugarcane? or do you import?

Yooostabeeee nothing but sugarcane grown here on St. Croix. The windmills for processing it still dot the island.

We <strike>have</strike> had a wonderful family run rum factory. For $2.35 you could get a really good bottle of rum--cheaper than the mixers! Since it has been bought out by some international concern they've changed the recipe and put in something that I'm alergic to. One sip and the back of my head feels like it's on fire. And now it costs a lot more than it used to.

Now its Mount Gay, or Barbancourt for special occasions.

I'll wait till you get back. Have a great sail!

[John B]

Billy,Popular here amongst boaties would be ummm, Coruba, Captain Morgan, Mount Gay, Appletons.The usual various grades . One not to try would be Fiji Overproof.
I'll think of some more later......

[igatenby]

That'd be right - the Kiwis boycott the good old Aussie Bundy (Bundaberg) Rum - then again, the Poms bought that distillery too.........

[Tristan]

Had a friend visited Iceland. Said they had sheep there. Some of them REAL pretty!

[igatenby]

My Kiwi mates reckon you can tell the pretty ones from the ugly ones after three days ....

[igatenby]

...and three days later, not a peep from the Kiwis :D

[Wild Dingo]

Strewth they just worked out which ones were the pretty ones! Think theyre interested in hangin out here when those ewes are smilin an winkin at them?? :cool: NOT A CHANCE!!! :eek: Theyll be busy as tics on a roos bum till Chrissy now theyve worked it out ;)

Ooooh Iceland has pretty sheepies too? Good! Say it louder mate then maybe the buggars will buggar of over there and leave our sheep roos and emus alone! poor creatures have no idea which way to run since the Kiwis invaded our shores :rolleyes: :D

[John B]

What ewe guys should do, is hop over to boat related and Look to see where we've been. whats that! can I hear something? ( swiiishhhhh) it, it sounds like the sound of the sea..........